When You Can't Trust Blood
12.15.2002 ||
who do you trust when you can't even trust your blood? people are disappointing only because of the expectations we make of them. but that's just inevitable...
before I start my proverbial thought trails, I just want to say that tonight was so strange. saw so many old schoolmates. found out some are MARRIED! ALREADY! wow! I don't even see myself getting married lol. It's like something I find DISTURBING lol. you can tell what kind of marriages i've been around...
tomorrow i'm heading off to a funktelligence concert in st. andrews in the D. i'm looking forweard to getting out of here. "home is where the heart is" but the saying should be "home is where the unbroken heart is" some people just make me want to stay at grand valley where I think I would be more independently happier. so many new friends made... miss em already! but im happy to see the ones here! can't wait to see what dates, friends, and scenes of the east side has to offer me!
but back to the blood thing. i've already learned that I can't trust people because trust gets taken for granted. It's torn and kicked and has had the hell beated out of it. and so when I find a stranger I can take to immediately, im astonished. how the hell does one stranger make me trust so easily, whereas people I thought I knew hurt me to no end. one stranger can go out of his/her way to make me feel comfortable... seemingly for no personal gain (or perhaps not) while my own blood could easily misplace my trust and pain me with actions of betrayal. I guess we have people who make our lives a little difficult. but I shall not turn my back on them... blood runs thick... and I will not deny it anymore.
i guess trust is one of those things that shouldn't be crossed. you never know what circumstance could arise because of it. I can trust few. but of the few I trust... I have learned to trust myself more...

before I start my proverbial thought trails, I just want to say that tonight was so strange. saw so many old schoolmates. found out some are MARRIED! ALREADY! wow! I don't even see myself getting married lol. It's like something I find DISTURBING lol. you can tell what kind of marriages i've been around...
tomorrow i'm heading off to a funktelligence concert in st. andrews in the D. i'm looking forweard to getting out of here. "home is where the heart is" but the saying should be "home is where the unbroken heart is" some people just make me want to stay at grand valley where I think I would be more independently happier. so many new friends made... miss em already! but im happy to see the ones here! can't wait to see what dates, friends, and scenes of the east side has to offer me!
but back to the blood thing. i've already learned that I can't trust people because trust gets taken for granted. It's torn and kicked and has had the hell beated out of it. and so when I find a stranger I can take to immediately, im astonished. how the hell does one stranger make me trust so easily, whereas people I thought I knew hurt me to no end. one stranger can go out of his/her way to make me feel comfortable... seemingly for no personal gain (or perhaps not) while my own blood could easily misplace my trust and pain me with actions of betrayal. I guess we have people who make our lives a little difficult. but I shall not turn my back on them... blood runs thick... and I will not deny it anymore.
i guess trust is one of those things that shouldn't be crossed. you never know what circumstance could arise because of it. I can trust few. but of the few I trust... I have learned to trust myself more...













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